A lot of people talk about the mid-life crisis. It’s a common thing for people to start behaving strangely, leave their jobs on a whim and run away, after spending their entire savings on an Aston Martin.
And yet a quarter-life crisis barely gets a mention! I don’t hear a damn thing about it! I do, however, see people experiencing it, left right and centre.
Quarter-life crisis (QLC) typically occurs in adults between the ages of 25-35 – perfect timing to experience an identity meltdown LOL.
I like to think of QLC as “survival mode” – a time where you contemplate your entire life all in one hit.
Where am I going? What am I doing? Do I really love that person? Am I really going to spend the rest of my life with them? Oh shit, I think I’ve done the wrong degree! I spent five years at Law school and I hate law! Why aren’t I married yet? Why don’t I just die really LOL LOL
This is normal, and you usually come out of it happier. In fact, it could very well be the best thing that will ever happen to you.
Post Crisis rocks! Trust me.
So ….. survival mode…. You come out of school, you try to find a respectful room mate that won’t shag in your bed while you’re away …or there? Anything can happen in your 20s, right?
You quickly go ahead and try to find a career path before your parents give you yet another lecture to blow your already messed up mind!
Early 20s is all one big rush, so you go ahead and make all these decisions really fast trying to keep up.
Mid 20s is where you try to pick up the pieces – this is crisis mode. You enter a dark place and you can’t seem to get it together!
This is all society and expectation. Imagine a world where there was no expectation at all? It’s hard, isn’t it? It’s really difficult to imagine that.
When I was going through my depression and anxiety, I would find myself searching for a sentence or a thought that would resonate with me and bring me back to peace. There were many, but the one thing I really used to think about that would bring me straight back to reality was this very simple and rather morbid little thought.
You are born, you do as many things as you can that make you happy, then you die.
I literally had to break it down and make it so simple because all of the mind chatter that I had going on which was causing the waves of anxiety in the first place!
I rolled with this for a long time. Even now when I feel the pressure I always come back to that. It really is about finding what little quirks you can use that resonate with you.
Choice in wording can make all the difference in bringing you back to the present moment 🙂
The QLC has many phases and it’s totally normal!
Phase One – You feel trapped. In every area of your life.
Phase Two – You start to think of ways to run … from literally everything – your relationship, your job, your whole entire life. But it’s painful because it’s just a thought at this stage. There is no action required and you just walk around all damn day thinking of an escape plan. This stage is totally exhausting.
Phase Three – You take the leap! You leave it all behind – not all at once (well, some of us all at once LOL). This stage is refreshing, but also EXTREMELY emotional! Tears for days! Months! Years! You spend a lot of time mourning your past life, wondering what the hell went wrong! Why on earth did you leave?
At the same time you are happier! It’s a mixture of emotions and it’s a crazy time. One minute you are on top of the world and the next you are bawling your eyes out in a shopping centre. And you don’t give a damn whose looking either.
Phase Four – You rebuild. You go into a slight solitude phase. And you rebuild.++-
Phase Five – You’re the happiest you have ever been! You followed your truth, and you are proud! You are looking the very best you have ever looked, you have made new friends and found new hobbies that totally align you! Your interests have changed and life could not be better.
Most people come out the ass end of this crisis in much better shape than when they arrived.
So, before you start wondering what the hell is wrong with you, know that everyone else is going through the same shit – boys and girls! ladies and gents!
Rest easy knowing that everyone else is totally winging it too!
I say this time and time again : Life is meant to be fun for us.
Stop stressing, babies. Stop stressing.